Back with more tilapia! Plus, who can resist the combination of orange and honey? Not this girl! Plus, a friend of mine has amazing hot honey that he sells. Of course, he'll be the first to tell you that local honey is best! With the weather cooling off, you may not be able to find a local farmer's market, but I encourage you to give it a shot!

Ingredients:
4 tilapia filets (frozen is just fine)
2 Tablespoons balsamic vinegar
1 Tablespoon honey
1 (10-ounce) can mandarin oranges, drained
aluminum foil
salt and pepper to taste at the table

Directions:

Use a 6-quart slow cooker. Lay a length of foil on your countertop and place the fish directly in the middle. Dribble balsamic vinegar and honey over the top of each fillet, and place a handful of drained mandarin oranges on top.

Fold over foil and crimp the edges to form a packet. Put the foil packet into your slow cooker, and put the lid on. You can make individual packets, but you really don’t need to.

Cook on high for two hours, or until fish flakes easily with a fork



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For the past few days, I've had this post in my head and yet, as I go to write it, that same mind is completely blank. This happens when the fog of depression begins to lift. The things that I had thought about while it covered me seem to dissipate with it. Still, I want to put down what I can and I hope that by sharing it, it will help those who care about me and those who may be having similar struggles or know someone who is. So...let's see what my brain wants to share...

Last week was absolutely horrible for me. You see, I was supposed to be spending the week near someone that means the world to me and a few weeks ago, that trip had to be cancelled. I'm not sure that I realized just how much I had been counting on that trip as a chance to recharge. At least I didn't until Monday.

You see, for as long as I can remember, I've set targets...points to get to...when I drive, I mentally break the trip down into little chunks so that it doesn't seem so long. When I have a period of time where I'm insanely busy, I find some point to get to. I tell myself that if I can just get to that point, it will be okay. It helps me keep going when I'm tired, rundown, and just want to give up. This trip was that point for me. If I could just get to the hotel, everything would be okay. I wouldn't have any responsibilities or anywhere I had to be.

Then, that was snatched away from me and I fell apart. That's the only way to put it. I woke up Monday morning and all day, my brain kept track of where I should be on the last stretch of the drive, of what I'd be doing in the hotel room, how long until I saw my friend...I mentally tortured myself and no matter what I tried, I couldn't stop it. Bipolar brain was fully in control and the more I fought it, the harder it got. I spent so much time in tears just wanting things to be different but knowing that there wasn't anything I could do.

Then, it got worse. When I wasn't thinking about what I "should" be doing, I started thinking about death. No, almost obsessing about it. I wasn't at any risk of killing myself then. I kept thinking about what would happen to various things if I were to die...my websites, my belongings...I became obsessed with the idea of creating a Death file on my laptop. I wanted to fill it with files laying out what I wanted to have happen...how I'd want Nick's original drawings returned to him because I truly feel that I'm only a temporary caretaker of them...how I'd want Geek-o-Rama offered to Brian and then if he didn't want it, I'd want a post placed on the site and left there for 6 months before shutting the site down. Every 30 minute drive in and out of town for 3 days, I obsessed over this.

Something changed on Wednesday evening...around the time that my friend would have been leaving me to go home...the fog started to lift. You see, in my head, the week had been planned out and when it reached a point where I would have been alone again, somehow it started to get easier. In some ways, it was as if I was living one week out loud and another in my head. At that moment, I came to some realizations and they've been floating in and out of my head since then.

Two paragraphs I said that I was at no risk of killing myself then, but that's not really true. I wasn't going to slit my wrists or take all of my medication at once, but I was killing myself...just slowly and in a way that nobody would realize what I was doing. I was going between starving myself and eating so horribly that it would eventually kill me. I stopped taking care of me and was so lost in the fog that I didn't notice. I was wandering blindly, desperately hoping that someone would reach out and give me something to hold onto.

It didn't happen though. Even though I pretty much disappeared from social media, didn't do the site's work for the week, or talk to anyone, nobody noticed or if they did, they didn't reach out. I was lost and there was nobody looking for me. Please don't misunderstand...I realize that other people are busy or just may not have been aware. I don't blame anyone. I'm not upset with anyone. It just hit home that the only people who said to me, "You matter" were on a Facebook post. It brought home just how isolating the fog is.

So here we are...a week out from the fog...and I'm not quite okay, but perhaps I'm no longer lost. I found my way through and I did it by myself. It was harder than if I'd had someone there to hold my hand but it shows that it can be done. I know that more dark times will come but I also hope that I can remember that I'm stronger than I seem and that I can be brave.




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Image blatantly borrowed from Ross' etsy shop

For quite a while now, I have had this little book sitting on the suitcases next to my bed (yes, I have suitcases stacked by my bed as a nightstand.) and I kept saying I was going to review it. Then, I went away this past weekend and brought back gazillions of pounds (just ask my shoulder) of new review material. In good conscience, I couldn't move on to review any of that (and you know I'm twitching to) without telling you about this humdinger of a book.

Now, most of you probably know that I have a degree in Psychology (aka the expensive piece of paper). Imagine my total delight when I found out that Ross (creator of Asbestos who I totally adore) had written a book where one of the main characters is none other than Pavlov's dog. Seriously. I probably squealed and for the 2nd time actually purchased review materials from Ross. Then, I waited...and waited...for my crazy post lady to bring it to me. Ross had clearly written do not bend on it..so she bent it right there and shoved it in my mailbox. Thankfully, it was ok and I spent my time waiting for the boys giggling and laughing my way through it.

Don't believe me? Read this page and don't laugh..if you can do that, well..I dunno. Maybe you need to double check you're wearing your sense of humor undies. If you're not wearing undies, please don't leave me a comment telling me that. Poor Schrodinger's cat doesn't have room in his box for me to hide.

Also stolen..erm..borrowed from Ross' Etsy shop.

That's it for now. Go. Buy. Give Ross money. Spend minutes, hours, days and even years laughing and giggling. You won't regret it.


I bought this book with my very own pennies. Ok, actually it was via Paypal and I doubt they sent Ross 700 pennies. It would be funny though if they did. All opinions, comments and things in ( ) are mine (and there were a lot of those, huh?). Y'all know that nobody really tells me what to write because I'm all rebel and stuff. Anyway, I now release you from reading this disclaimer. Have a nice day.


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I have a secret. I'm not sure I should tell anyone since I have this reputation of being all Little Miss DIY, not girly girl...Oh, who am I kidding? Nobody believes that anymore. They used to. I used to have guys tell me that I was the least girly girl they knew. Now, I still love DIY but I'm also into nail polish and *gasp* shoes. I know..I know...how cliche, right?

But, have you tried out a pair of Kalso Earth Shoes? I have and man, they are awesome! Truth be told, I practically begged to be allowed to review a pair for them. Luckily, the lovely lady who handles it was probably amused by my eagerness and hooked me up with the pair of shoes you see to your left there. Those are The Link Too and yes, they really are that cute in person too! The first day I wore them out, I received compliments.

If you know me, you know I have a very hard time wearing shoes all day long. In fact, when I walk in the door at night, the first thing to happen is I kick my shoes off. Not these! I found myself wearing them all day long and I was home for a good 30 minutes before I realized I hadn't taken them off. They're just plain comfy as well as cute! I confess that for the first bit of time I kept finding myself stepping out of them when I walked. That's all on me though. I'm just not used to wearing this type of shoe.

So, what makes these so awesome other than cute and comfy? It's all about "Negative Heel Technology." What is this craziness you speak of? I heard you say it...It means that your heel is actually slightly lower in the shoe than your toes. Think about walking in sand. It's that same effect. Pretty cool, huh? If you look over to your left, there's a pretty snazzy graphic that shoes what this does for your body. I have to tell you that it was wearing a pair of shoes like this back in the spring that totally saved my knee when I sprained it.

Now, since I know you want to see these shoes "in person", I have 2 things for you. The first thing...a picture of me wearing said cute shoes:


See? Super cute and I have to say they look good against the Fall leaves. I wish we had more colorful ones in our yard but sadly, we just didn't this year. It's probably because we only have one walnut tree in the front yard.

Right. You don't care about the leaves in my yard. You want to know how you can see these shoes for yourself. After all, I did say there were two ways..Ok, nobody squeal too loud but Kalso Earth Shoes is letting me give one of you lucky readers a pair of shoes! Now, I can't promise that they'll be the same ones I received. The pair that they send you will totally be based upon your size and their stock. Want to know how to win? Here are the rules:

The giveaway will run from today (10/19) until October 31st at 11:59pm. Any entries received after that point will not be counted. On November 1st, I will draw a winner and that winner will be contacted via email. If I can't find the winner's email address, I will draw a new winner. The winner has 72 hours to email me back with their shipping information. If I don't hear back, a new winner will be chosen. Contest open to residents of the USA. Got all that? Ok, now on to how to enter:

Please leave a separate comment for each entry:
1. Publicly follow me on either Networked Blogs and/or Google Friend Connect. (1 entry - Maximum 2 entries.)
2. Post this giveaway to Facebook. (1 entry - Maximum 1 entry per day.)
3. Head on over to the Kalso Earth Shoe Facebook Page and leave a comment there telling them which of their shoes is your favorite. (1 entry.)
4. Follow me on Twitter (1 entry)
5. Follow Kalso Earth Shoes on Twitter (1 entry)
6. Tweet out this message (up to 5x a day - Maximum 5 entries per day.):

"I just entered to win a pair of @KalsoEarthShoes from @craftsbykatie ! Enter today for your chance to win: http://www.lifewithkatie.com/2011/10/review-giveaway-kalso-earth-shoes.html"

Spread the word!



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A while back, I wrote a post entitled Dreams Can Become Reality. In it, I mentioned a desire to be more transparent. At the time, I had a blog post brewing in my head. It wasn't anything dramatic, just a simple 10 things you may not have known about me. However, in true me fashion as of late, the post never got written. Then, today, I was pointed towards Tony's post The Word "Wish" and in it, he mentioned Ryan's post What I Wish More People Knew About Me. Guess what that post is? A 10 things you may not know about me post. Between the pair of them, I'm convinced it's time to write my own 10 things list. Are you ready for this? I'm not sure that I am but the time is right and the time is now.

1.) I love to write but I'm afraid that nobody ever reads it or cares about what I write. - I've been blogging for about 12 years now (yes, before Blogger even existed!) and to this day, I'm sure that nobody ever reads it. I tell myself that I write for me and in part, that's very true, but like most people, I crave the feedback and the oh my gosh, that's awesome responses that I see other places.

2.) I have no idea what I want to do when I grow up. - Seriously. Not one single clue. Recently, I realized it's because I love so many things and I just don't quite know how to put them all together. Then, I realized that maybe this blog is how to put them all together. Then, I realized I don't know how to make that happen so I'm back at step 1 again. Ok, maybe step 1a. I'm not really sure.

3.) I will pick things up out of people's trash or on the side of the road. - It's true. For example, the shelving in my bathroom? Total on the side of the road with a free sign on it find. A ton of scrubbing later (I think it was stored in a machine shed..it had grease and grime everywhere!) and it's currently holding toilet paper and extra shampoo/soap/etc. Last night, at 11pm, I pulled to the side of the street and snagged a milk crate filled with flower pots. I have no shame. Really.

4.) I consider myself a baby blogger & it makes my day to have a grown up blogger talk to me or comment on one of my posts.  - I know that it's baffling to people like Janice & Susan from 5MinutesForMom when I get all hyper and giddy when one of them comment, but it happens every single time. I've been blogging for 12 years and I have 60 followers. I'm not approached by big companies. I don't have 10,000 Twitter followers. Heck, I can't even make it to 500. I'm a nobody in the blogger world so when a somebody talks to me, it blows my mind. I swear Tom Cruise could come up and have a conversation with me and I'd be like well, that was nice, but for example, if Ryan, Tony, or I dunno...Ree were to comment on this post or heaven help me, actually send others to follow me, read my posts or anything, I'd practically fall off my bed. I want these people to be my friends but I'm pretty sure they don't know I exist.

5.) I am obsessively organized but my house is a disaster right now. - This one is tough to write about because everyone thinks I have it so together, but the truth is, I'm digging out when it comes to my house. I'm a serious packrat and due to emotional issues stemming back to childhood, I tend to collect to give myself a sense of security. It's false security and I know this so I'm digging my way out. I'm blessed to have two awesome kids who are helping me in this process.

6.) I have a degree in Psychology but I don't psychoanalyze people. - This might seem weird to some, but recently, I was accused of psychoanalyzing someone because I asked them if there was a reason for why they did what they were doing. I had to point out to them that if they'd known me before I was handed a piece of paper, I would have asked them the same question. My mind has always worked along those lines and it's part of the reason people tend to come to me for advice.

7.) I'm not like all the other girls you know.  - I'm including this one because it was pointed out to me recently that I don't think and act like other women. I honestly couldn't exactly explain why this is or how I'm different, just that I tend to think differently on a variety of subjects. I learned a long time ago that this world is not black or white. I think in shades of grey, I guess you could say.

8.) I have a hard time not being on. - In other words, I have a hard time shutting off. I was taught at a fairly young age that I was the one responsible for things I never should have been responsible for. It's led me to be that person who feels she has to fix the world. If something is wrong, it's very hard for me to not jump in. My brain is always running at psychotic speeds and that doesn't always stop when I go to sleep. This also means that I have a hard time simply relaxing and enjoying things. I've been blessed to find certain people in my life who have that ability. When I'm with them, I can shut down and just relax. I don't have to think or fix things.

9.) I think in shades of grey and yet have a need to define everything. - Figure that one out. I honestly can't, but it's the truth. I rarely think of things as black or white and yet, I'm constantly trying to define or compartmentalize things. It's the most baffling thing. It happens most often with relationships. I need to know precisely where I stand with people. The unknown is terrifying to me. I know that it comes from childhood and the instability and insecurities but I also know it drives people insane sometimes when they're dealing with me.

10.) Sometimes I hate the internet. - Please don't shoot me or send me hate mail for this one. You have to understand that I've been online since before Google existed. I've been part of the online community since before everyone had a web page. In terms of the internet, I'm old and old people get tired. For me, there's a certain exhaustion that sometimes rolls around when I sit down behind a computer screen. I long for the days when I hung out with people whose faces I could see or whose hands I could touch. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't exchange any of my online friends for anything, but I'm human and sometimes I crave face to face interaction with people. I also think that the internet has caused us to become socially lazy. I've seen how the acronyms we invented back in talker days have become common use and how people somehow think that sending a Facebook message somehow replaces a phone call or even..and nobody have a heart attack here...but mail. Not email. Real mail. In internet slang (yes slang) snail mail. That stuff that you have to actually walk out to the mailbox to get. I received a just because card in the mail yesterday and let me tell you, it made my day that someone took the time to find a card for me, to write in it, to address an envelope and to actually mail it. Sometimes, I hate the internet and the laziness and impersonal interactions that we have allowed it to lead to. People are people even if they're living behind a screen. I think sometimes we tend to forget that and forget that as humans, we require interactions to have healthy psyches.

11.) I am a survivor. - I know I said 10, but I wanted/needed to include this one. I am a survivor. I have survived emotional and physical abuse. I have survived rape. I have survived divorce and more. I am a survivor and I need to remember this. I can do anything.

There are probably so many more things that I could write about but for now, I'm going to leave you with those and go take some deep breathes. That post was tougher to write than I think I realized it would be. I hope that maybe my words will inspire you to write your own post. Let's really get to know one another. I promise it's a good thing.



PS Yes, that is actually a picture of me...one of the rare ones that exist. If you're not sure, I'm the girl on the left. It was at a radio event last year. I miss my show but like #1, I was convinced no one ever listened.

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Ugh. Blogger is giving me fits today. It won't let me upload my graphic which is highly frustrating. Then again, a lot of life is frustrating, isn't it? Families who refuse to help out, people who forget to tell you when your children's parent teacher conferences are and the list could go on. I'm not going to let it though, not in this post. This post is all about yummy food and because I didn't get to eat this delicious menu a couple of weeks ago, I'm going to attempt to use it this week. Wish me luck! Oh, and if you want to check out these recipes, head over to Can I Get The Recipe?

Dinners of the Week:
Monday - Feta and Sun-dried Turkey Burger Sliders
Tuesday - Dragon’s Creamy Shrimp Pasta with Mushrooms and Peas
Wednesday - Slow Cooker Honey Garlic BBQ Ribs
Thursday - Vegetable Chowder
Friday - Madonna “Big Momma” Ballzini’s Risotto and Meatballs (Changing this to some sort of pasta)
Saturday - Leftovers
Sunday - Other Leftovers

Happy Monday, everyone. Remember that sore throat? Well, it's turned into a full blown head cold. Ick! I have a very strong suspicion that it's going to turn all my good intentions and plans for this week into nothing more than good intentions and plans. I'm hoping not, but we'll have to see. After all, taking care of myself is more important than moving stuff out to the barn, right? Right.

Now, due to this unexpected illness, I did have a bit more time to catch up on a few computer items this morning. I'm going to be helping in another "charity" scrapbooking group. Some of you may remember the scrapbook that some of us put together for Anita.Now, I'm going to be creating pages for a little girl named Abby. As a mom, her story is heartbreaking and yet, inspiring as she continues to battle her way through life. This morning, I was lucky enough to be able to choose some photos to create scrapbook pages of. I feel honored to be able to do this for this family. When the pages are complete, I'll post photos of them here but for now, I'd love it if you all read Abby's story and left some love for her mom on their blog.

Being able to find support and to give it, is just one benefit of being a blogger. Another is finding incredible blogs that make your life easier. I've found one such blog and I have to share it with you. It's Can I Get The Recipe? I love this blog/website! Plus, I've interacted some with the lovely lady behind the site on Twitter and she's super nice! Double bonus, if you ask me. I dislike using/reading sites where I can't feel a connection with the person behind the code. Well, being sick and the fact that she put up a totally delicious looking menu this week, I did zero thinking for my menu. I'm totally taking hers. Did I mention that she also has it setup so you can print the shopping list right off of her site? Of course, I didn't know this until I'd already written it out, but that's not her fault! lol!

Dinners of the Week:
Monday - Feta and Sun-dried Turkey Burger Sliders
Tuesday - Dragon’s Creamy Shrimp Pasta with Mushrooms and Peas
Wednesday - Slow Cooker Honey Garlic BBQ Ribs
Thursday - Vegetable Chowder
Friday - Madonna “Big Momma” Ballzini’s Risotto and Meatballs (Changing this to some sort of pasta)
Saturday - Leftovers
Sunday - Other Leftovers

Dessert of the Week:
Dark Chocolate Red Velvet Cake

Snack of the Week:
Snickerdoodles

Doesn't this look delicious? I totally encourage you to go over and check out her website. She has all of the recipes, shopping lists and ideas you could ever need!

It's Tuesday but so feels like a Monday. I'm always a little bit thrown off when the boys are here for a four day weekend. Of course, I wouldn't trade those extra days with them for anything. I love having them here with me and I love the boys that they're turning out to be. I've worried sometimes if my absence while I finished my degree didn't harm them, but it seems that they're doing just fine. Granted, it's not as if they never, ever saw or heard from me for those two years.

Anyway, I want to keep this post kinda short because I want to go do my tackle before I "forget" and don't do it. What would be so dasterdly, you ask? Well, I need to haul our outside trash can to the curb. Yes, the snow is melting slowly and yes, I did shovel the driveway, but I didn't shovel up to where the trash can is which means I may have to haul it a few feet through a good foot of snow. Ick! But, it needs to be done. Tomorrow morning is trash pickup and our can is verrrry full. So full, in fact, that I can't put anything more in it. The excitement never ends, eh?

Once I have that done, I need/want/can't wait to work on a scrapbook page. I was selected as one of Crop Chocolate's chocolatiers and once we receive our kit, we have two weeks to create with it. The best part is that you can create anything you want using it. You just have to submit photos of it in progress and completed. I don't know if they're accepting anymore people to the "team" but the really nice part about this company is that it wasn't a competition. If you signed up, you got to be on the team. It's a really great company with really nice service.

As for my page, I'm keeping it really simple for now. I haven't done any serious scrapbooking in about 5 years (long story as to why) so I'm easing my way back into it and testing to see if my creativity is still there. Hopefully they are. I had some fun last night playing with chalks and inks and it felt good to just be creative without any pressures.

So now that I've babbled on and on, I need to post this and go tackle that trashcan..and hope I don't end up with a snowy bum for my efforts!